Choices

 Hello Grandchildren,

Today's character trait I would like to talk about is making "choices".

A choice is "an act of making a decision when faced with two or more possibilities."

You make hundreds of decisions each day without thinking much about them. I want to talk about making choices and the importance of how choosing wisely can play in your life.

Grandpa's viewpoint

We talked about "character" last month. How you make choices and ultimately the choices you do make will tell you, and others, what type of person or what kind of character you have. (More about this later).

1. Some choices you make are more important to consider than other choices.

• Easier and/or Smaller Choices
• What should I have for breakfast is normally considered an easier choice, but it could become hard depending on the situation.
• Is it a special day today? (hard choice maybe?)
• Is someone going to make breakfast for me or do I need to make it for myself?
• I eat cocoa puffs every day for breakfast, (easier choice.)
• What should I wear today?
• This can be easier or harder depending on how you want to present yourself to those around you. (easier if you don't care - a little harder if you do care...)
• Or, maybe it depends on what you have available to you. (I have a huge volume of clothing, so it may become hard.)
• How about, am I going to get angry because of something that happened to me?
• No - this is an easy choice from my point of view. You can choose to be angry or not. Always try to choose not to get angry.
• Harder and/or Bigger choices
• Should we buy a new, (newer) car or should we make this one last a little longer?
• Which college should I go to? (From Grandpa's point of view, going to college is not a choice, Grandpa made that choice for you - yes you are going to college! (Just kidding :)).
• Who should I get married to?
• Should I buy this beautiful item on credit if I don't have the money?

2. Grandpa's Simple Choices Graph

I thought I would create a "Grandpa's Simple Choice Graph" for you that might make things simpler as we discuss making choices.

This graph is to simply show that there are many types of decisions we can make, with many outcomes. We want to make the best decisions we can make in life, but it is not always easy for us as we live our lives. I believe we become a person of good character when we choose wisely, and wisely is always in the "Best, Better, and Good" area of this graph.

Here are a few choices of how Grandpa Randall would rate eating dinner out at certain restaurants using the choice categories on my little graph :).

• Choose to eat at "Corky's BBQ" for dinner. (Best - Grandpa just loves "Corky's BBQ.")
• Choose to eat at "Los Jalapeños" (or "Culver's" for you MN) for dinner. (Better)
• Choose to eat at "Olive Garden" for dinner. (Good)
• Choose to eat "Denny's" for dinner. (Whatever)
• Choose to eat at a "Sushi" place with other options for dinner. (Bad - from Grandpa's point of view. :))
• Choose to eat at a "Sushi only" place for dinner. (Worse- from Grandpa's point of view. :))
• Choose to eat at "Fat Dave's" for dinner. (Terrible)

3. Remember, there are consequences to our choices

A "consequence" is the results or the effects of the choices we make. We can make whatever desicions we want to make, but it is wise to try to understand what the results, or the consequences of that choice will be. That helps us understand what type of choice we are making.

Some examples of consequences from the above graph:

• I have a great and happy experience eating at Corky's. I don't get sick. Although, I might eat too much food because I like it so much - so maybe it is just a Better choice....
• My food at Fat Dave's is greasy, it doesn't taste good, and the waitress doesn't treat me very nicely. And, I probably will get sick!

I could write a lot of books about consequences but I am going to leave that for another day.

4. Choose wisely

Here are some things you can do to make "good, better, and best choices."

• Take time to make the choice.
• Think how this decision will effect you and others.
• Ask yourself if making this choice is helping you to keep God's commandments? (Grandpa Randall strongly believes in God, and keeping His commandments.)
• If it is important, pray about it. Maybe several times.
• Do you feel good about your choice? If you don't, think again. (Grandpa always tries to follow the promptings from the Holy Ghost.)
• If you make a bad, worse, or even a terrible decision, don't worry. You can always learn from those poor decisions and decide to choose better next time.
• I have made all of the above 7 decision types in my life. I have learned from them all.

Summary

Making decisions is one of the most important things you will do in your life. Decisions will take you down paths of learning. You will find happiness and joy in most of the better decisions in life. It may not be immediately, but it will always come. You will find some sorrow and pain in the worse decisions you make. It may not be felt immediately, but it too, will come.

Grandpa believes that you "reap what you sow." Keep trying to make good, better, and best decisions in life and you will grow up to have great character and be happier too.

Examples of Choosing

1. Grandpa's first car (Worse - Maybe even Terrible Decision)

I told this story to Cole the other day, but I think it is a good example of a "worse" choice (or maybe even a "terrible" choice.)

I bought a Toyota, (or maybe a Datsun) pickup truck with my own money just after my mission and right before I went to college. I bought it when my parents were out of town, so I was on my own. I got really excited to go to a car dealership (Ron Tonkin) just up the road from my house. The truck was red, but it had a green door. I got a really good price on it. I talked them down from $1,800 to $1,200 - no problem. I took my truck and got a new paint job - candy apple red, so the door matched the rest of the car.

I drove my two sisters, Julie and Jane, to college in it. The three of us in the front, with my motorcycle and all our stuff in the back. We made it to college, but then I went to my Grandma's for the weekend and the engine blew up. I didn't know enough about this purchase as I probably should have. I should have taken it to a mechanic before purchasing, so that he could check to see if there were any engine problems. I had to get a new (used) engine for $700. I didn't have enough of money so I had to get a loan. I ended up paying the loan back eventually and I traded my red truck for my tan el camino, a better choice.

If I had waited until my parents got home to buy the car, I could have had their help and their advice before making a terrible decision. I was too excited in doing it all myself thinking I was a "big boy" now. :). Pride got in my way of making a good decision.

Me, Jane, and Julie, with my newly painted red truck with my motorcycle in the back.

2. Choosing to marry Grammy (Best Decision)

This was the "Best" choice for Grandpa. It wasn't very easy to finally find her, but it was worth the wait. I was confused at the type of person I wanted to marry. I finally figured out that I needed to be the type of person someone would want to marry. I started living my life in a better way, making better decisions for my life, and to live I wanted to have. I won't go into all the details here in this example, but I did spend some important time in prayer about it.

The consequences of marrying Grammy are that we ended up having a wonderful family of 5 children, all of who got married and had children - you! We are so happy to have so many wonderful grandchildren. We love each of you tremendously. This is a wonderful consequence we really could not see when we first decided to get married. I think Grammy was thinking we would have three children and I thought we would have 6. That was a fun conversation to have :), and keep having :)....

3. Grandpa's Mission Shirts (Whatever Decision)

This example is a bit more difficult to share. It is not easy to find "middle of the road" decisions, which can be neither good nor bad. They just are.

When Grandpa was having to make a decision on which shirts to bring to the Philippines, I was told to bring some shirts to wear when I was not at the temple. I brought about 10 collared shirts. It didn't matter which shirts really, I just decided 10 was a good number and picked 10. I didn't think much about which ones, although I must have had some minimum criteria probably regarding how cool, or how hot, it would be here in Manila.

The shirts have been just fine. The decision was not a big decision and it was pretty easy to choose, so I kind of just put this in the "whatever" decision category.

We make a lot of these decisions each day, and it is okay to just make a short, quick decision on an every day matter because it is just not that important. But, when it does matter, and you are having a little bit harder time deciding. Choose wisely, or in other words Choose the right and you can't go wrong.

Me and Grammy. I have one of my 10 collared shirts on here :)

I thought I would add one more family picture.

We chose to have these five lovely children, a great and "Best" decision!